movement

Ive been yearning for this for quite a while. Some form of movement within me. Some sort of self-help and discovery into something i thought i knew.My soul has been and is screaming. And i am happy that things have changed. And i pray that they stay changed for good. Because i must beleive that everything doesnt happen by chance. And that there is really a reason behind this. And i dont want this to be another passing phase.



Please God, make this last. forever.



For the past two days, rather than relaxing like i planned, i have been and still am for the next week or so, immersing myself in numerous workshops, film screenings and talks hosted by Shaykh Khalil Moore.





I have not been so moved spiritually ever.



He has opened up my mind, eyes, soul and heart to so many things that i have taken for granted. And he has enlightened me. I've made a promise to myself that once im done with my A's , i'm going to become a lot more active at the convert's association.



Back to the film i caught last night. Boy, not only was the cinematography and acting beatiful but it was steeped in information and simply put, it was glorious. I really advice anyone and everyone to catch it. Spectacular.

I wish i could talk more on the change ive experienced, but i really havent got the time and i doubt i would be able to articulate myself sufficiently here.

Oh well, i guess its back to school in a day. GAH.

8 weeks , farah. 8 weeks.

Much love,

farah

'Tis over. For now.

Im done with the dreaded JCT's! WOOHOO.

I came home and cooked up some uber-fattening but scrumptious chocolatte fondue and now im a happy little green pig :)

Well, of course im dreading the results but for now, im going to bask in the glory of actually being able to get some sleep and smile a lil more.

I am starting the extended study hours on Monday which sucks and looking at my papers, i'm probably going to be down for remedials. Oh well.

anyway,

Its so good to finally get down to doing things that i planned to during the holidays like uploading old photos, catching up with emails that i have to reply, spending time resting etc.etc. Although i only have 3 days, imma make the most of them. What i really want to do is go to little india, fatten myself up and then go to chinatown and look at funky ancient shops. Ooh. I want to go visit arab st and go to the chor bazzar which means theives market. Its basically a whole field filled with second-hand(stolen) goods. :) Exciting much. But i'm probably going to keep that in view for post A levels.

And, bestie Mumtash is coming down in three days. That means intoxicated friends and good times. For a while.

Meanwhile, Its mom's birthday! I was going to buy her her gift yesterday but the damn shop was closed. I have to wait till the 1st of july. I felt horrible so i bought her roses, a peach tart with a candle on it and a small packet of cotton candy :) I made her a card too which had a picture of both of us on the front. 'Twas fun. We're going for dinner soon so i better run off and get pretty. My pictures are taking waaay too long to upload. No surprise though there are like 2000 or something. Im going to have to put them under a folder named " Half of '08". Oh well, perchance i might pop by wiht more photographs later. For now, im going to blast kenny loggin's Footloose cos there isnt a better song to let loose too :)

im finally feeling the holidays.

Much Love,

farah

Imagine

I love my its-way-too-large-for-anyone imagine sweater. Its going to be my companion over the next 6 days. Till then, i'll be scratching the papers down. Perhaps, i might get out of the country at the end of the JCTs. Perhaps, bintan. Im sure a little sun, sand and sea will do my body and brain some good. Till then, it looks like a stressful week ahead ( i cannot beleive its back to college! )

Today was fun. I had a date with the president of THESPIS maaaan. HAHA :)


OKAY. Till next week. JCTs , here i come

1.PC paper 4

2.General Paper

3.Mathematics

4.Chemistry

5.PC paper 1

6.Physics

Long train running,

Much love,

farah

Bright Lights

A mug of black tea. Water. The 80's grooves. Adrenaline. Feels like

we're heading back to the O's. I hope it stays this way. I like.

Much midnight oil,

Farah

Night

I cant believe how my life has turned into a soap opera. I never imagined us sitting, crying, praying in an embrace like that. Life is a big big test. Its a big, scandalous, blasphemous test. But we'll get through, somehow. I need to hold on. I cannot let go. Not this year.

Not now.

Not ever.

this song keeps playing over and over again in my head.

and i'll follow you into the dark,

Much Love,

farah

We.Don't.Need to say goodbye, tonight.

I love it when songs talk to you. Or at least, when you convince yourself that they are reaching out to you and its in no way pure chance or coincidence.See, i'm the type of person who completely lives for and through music. There is something facinating about how one can tune into any song at his/her own frequency and understand it the only way they choose to. Another thing that is able to do this, is apparently Jane Austen. I just watched the Jane Austen Bookclub. Two words: Must Watch!

Its was a lovely combination of wit and raw human emotions it was practicaly meta-connecting. Amitha and i are still having an ongoing discussion ( arguement ) about who the character Jocelyn represents - Darcy or Elizabeth. Now, we have been completely inspired to start a Jane Austen Bookclub of our own - once i graduate that it is, and if i get into NUS, itll be purrrfect :)

Moving on,

back to where i started, on the topic of songs, i've been hearing an awful lot of familiar songs in movies lately. Songs that are either special or have been special to me this past year or so. ( by special i mean a really important phase or memory attached to it ) Anyway, the sad thing is, while these songs inevitably evoke torrents of emotions, i can't seen to reel in its relevance and my frequency kind of gets deflected to a whole new physical plane of absolute emptyness. I made sense there, i promise.

So yes. Its sad i guess since im such a music junkie.

Alright. Im hoping my phone will be fixed by tomorrow. And i hereby promise to go get the phone and come straight home.

By the way, my revision is (as we speak) swirling down the manhole.

I think this has been a long enough post. My fingers are starting to feel arthiritic. Oh no.

Im feeling rather disjointed.

Just like my thoughts.

And emotions.

Disjointed.

In fact,

totally detached from me.

Just.

Gone.

We watch the season

Pull up it’s own stakes

And catch the last weekend

Of the last week

Before the gold and the glimmer have been replaced

Another sun soaked season fades away

-dashboard confessional, stolen

Strain this chaos turn it into light

I've got to see you one last night

Before the lions take their share

Leave us in pieces, scattered everywhere

- snow patrol, all i have

Goodbye moochahchoes.

Much Love,

Farah

lyrics stuck in my head

Angus and Julia Stone.

Living on a diet of Chocolates & Cigarettes
I wanna call you again
Ill drink tea sometimes when its cold
This is getting old
I call you again .
Still too young to fail, too scared to sail away
But one of these days
Ill grow old
And Ill grow brave and
Ill go
One of these days

Blowing out the candles from my cake
I choke on the smoke as I look around the room
Everybodys wishing for no more mistakes
And all that I can think about is you

Still too young to fail, to scared to sail away
But one of these days
Ill grow old
And Ill grow brave and
Ill go One of these days
La da la da la da

Still too young to fail,
to scared to sail away
But one of these days
Ill grow old
And Ill grow brave and
Ill go
One of these days
La da la da la da

Missing you, me, figaro and our cigarettes

Ive been a mess. I was on task. Now, im way behind. Also, I'm starting to get very affected. Perhaps, i have always been but i've been trying to keep it within me. But, im no superwoman. Im sorry you had to see me cry like that. On a lighter note, the new barista is yummy, hence, so is my coffee :D


Hearty haikus


I'm glad that i'm home
enough in Starbucks to kick
my pretty shoes off.


Take them off, and curl
on that dark, hard, teak chair and
feel comfortable.


Then, I'll drown in your
coffee eyes and earl grey lips
sighing brown sugar.


In my vanilla
cuppacino is your skin
-smooth cocoa butter.


Give your chocolatte
heart and i'll be your yummy,
hot, cinammon wife.


And, we'll have pudding
babies in a wafer house
filled with cream,cream,cream.


I'll stay till the last
sip and lick those wrinkled lips
no matter how stale.


At our funeral,
they'll sing only BB King
and sway to the blues.


And i promise to
meet you again without my
shoes on a wooden chair

Much love,

farah

ChompChomp

Well done drama :)

I owe this too the mardi gras cast and crew and maryam and amitha cos thay did a beyond brilliant job. I somehow don't want to blog about how spectacular it was cos i refuse to see closure of any sort.

All i can say is that i am so proud to have been given the chance to lead and live with this club and i don't ever want to leave it.

But that said, it is 18 days to my JCTs. Somehow, im kind off psyched about it. Perhaps, its cos ive been studying . Then again, i dont know how long i'll last. Ive already started falling ill :( * sneeze*

Also, I recently watched this film called Annie Hall. Its been aptly called a nervous romance. I couldn't have phrased it better so kudos to IMDb.:) It truly is a whimsical tale that'll appeal to neurotics and lovers alike. Its not only a laugh out loud type comedy but it has a sweet and warm nature about it while it still manages to appeal to the darker side of humour in human flaw. Key philosphical aspects were also weaved into the non-linear storyline that provokes the viewer to question their on lives and love. Charmingly characterised and scripted, its acted out by seasoned veterans ( not to seasoned at that point ) Dianne Keaton and Woody Allen. It also bagged 4 Oscars and 25 other wins ( that includes winning over my heart and soul ). So whoppeedoo for Annie Hall. Please, go watch it. Get your hands on the film somehow or bug me for it. If i trust you enough, i'll lend you the gem :)

Anyway, i have to go sleep this bug off. Or at least try to do so. I feel like placing a lighted match up my nose. Grrr.

Toodles one and all.

Much Love,

Farah